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Interview With A Sex Goddess -- Annie Sprinkle
Vermont WomanWe love your website! It’s really beautiful, and we love that beautiful quote. We know you are an expert in the field of human sexuality: you've been a star in sexy movies; you've been a professional sex worker; you've made sexy art, and written sexy books; and you have a PhD in human sexuality. We hear you've got a new book coming out -- what's it all about? Annie SprinkleIt's Dr. Sprinkle's Spectacular Sex: Makeover Your Love Life [Tarcher/Penguin], and it's scheduled to be out in May. An agent approached me from New York -- he thought I’d be ripe to do a “how-to” book, and he encouraged me. I love makeovers, of all kinds; I came up with “Your Sex Life Makeover,” but they changed that title because they were afraid people didn’t want to admit that they needed makeovers... It's fourteen steps that you can use -- it’s really like my life’s work rolled into one big how-to book. The gist of it is, here’s all these things you can do -- and all these choices you can make -- and only you know what’s best for you; there’s no one right way, just find your truth and do it your way. It’s a very open-minded, compassionate, and fun book -- a lot of fun exercises and things to try… Like create an alter-ego, or two alter-egos -- a slut alter-ego and a goddess alter-ego, for example. And it’s for men, too, although it’s way more geared to women. I wrote the whole thing for women and then the publishers said well, men want to read this, too; so I included men, a little bit. But it's really a book for women. There's a part about communication skills, and there’s a lot of information on female orgasm and energy orgasm and tips on how to get there; this material is kind of internal. There’s one chapter on making over your bedroom, making over your wardrobe, and decorating your body; that one is external, and pretty much all the others are internal. Like self-esteem, and loving your body the way it is; making over your mind -- how you view sex, seeing it in different ways. I just finished it, and we’ll have press copies in mid-April; the official release date is May 19. Vermont WomanWe would love a press copy, and if you could squeeze us into your book tour we’d love that, too. Annie SprinkleI’d love to come to Vermont! That would be fantastic; if there’s a bookstore or if someone wants to sponsor a workshop -- the best thing is a college lecture. Keep your ears open for students who might want to bring me there… or theater producers. Vermont WomanAnnie, you are such a hard-working woman. Looking at your schedule -- you’re touring colleges, film festivals, the San Francisco Sex Worker Film Festival. We thought oh my god, when does she unpack?! Annie SprinkleIt’s so funny you say that because I look at my schedule and I think, “Oh my god I don’t have hardly any work!” I was just complaining to my partner, “I need to book work!!!!” I don’t get to all the film festivals; sometimes it’s just my film I'm showing. Vermont WomanYour film, Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of Orgasm -- is this the most in-depth film ever done on the subject? Annie SprinkleIt’s certainly the most specific. I don’t know of any other films specifically about orgasm. I think there were a couple documentaries in Britain, and there’s one called Faces of Ecstasy which is just people’s faces having orgasm. But this is interviews with orgasm experts -- it’s kind of an experimental film in that it covers the whole range of possibilities of orgasm, from a whole range of people -- so it’s very diverse. Vermont WomanWe hope you'll bring the film along when you come on the book tour. Annie SprinkleIt’s on video right now, and it’s playing film festivals; but I haven’t made the DVD yet to sell. Vermont WomanWhat did you do at your last performance? Annie SprinkleI did a reading in a San Francisco bookstore, in the Castro -- it was very interesting, very nice, a wonderful evening. As for my ongoing work -- you can see on the website loveartlab.org -- I'm in a relationship with a woman now, and we’re committed to a seven-year performance piece to explore love as art. So tomorrow we’re actually going to be in an art gallery -- she has a show up of sculpture, photographs -- and we just had our first wedding, the first of seven we're going to have. Vermont WomanIs this with Elizabeth Stevens? We’re so lucky to talk with you because you had a wedding and just got back from your honeymoon, didn’t you? Annie SprinkleYes, Elizabeth Stevens. That’s right, you guys are busy with weddings in Vermont, right? Aren’t they doing them up there? Vermont WomanIt has fallen off a bit; it’s old hat – people are getting divorced now. Annie SprinkleWe started this seven-year piece -- we did the first of seven weddings, in the gallery; a whole installation; it’s interacting with the guests -- the guests are all participants in the wedding performance. We have a bed in the art gallery, and tomorrow we’re gonna do a piece called “Cuddling,” from 2:00 to 5:00: people who come to the gallery can make little appointments and for seven minutes, lie between us and cuddle, as art, in the art gallery. Vermont WomanWhat a great, loving piece of art. Annie SprinkleSo today we were shopping, looking for snuggly outfits. Vermont WomanTell us about the outfits! Annie SprinkleWe decided we’re going to have them made, because we couldn’t find any outfits that we liked that were stylish and snuggly, chic and cuddly. But it’s going to be fun. We have a timer; every seven minutes someone will lie between us, and our dog Bob is going to be at the foot of the bed. Vermont WomanKind of like Seven Minutes in Heaven. Annie SprinkleThat’s the idea. Although, I guess different people will have different experiences. Vermont WomanTell us what you wore at your wedding. Annie SprinkleEach wedding and wedding year has a theme and a color, which this year is red. So we had really glittery costumes. It was all red -- the guests wore red, the place was red, everything was red, we wore red, the cake was red, the rice was red! Next year will be orange. Our theme this year was “security.” That’s part of the cuddling piece -- security, get under the security blanket. So I was just having fun, doing a lot of “labors of love” you might say, as well as having this book come out, which is a mainstream publication -- the most mainstream project I’ve ever done. Vermont WomanThe mainstream needs you, and I think they’re ready. Annie SprinkleThank you! I tried to be my most, ah, wholesome… Vermont WomanWas that hard? Annie SprinkleI didn’t even want to use the word ‘p***y,’ for example; I wanted it to have a very clean-cut, wide-range appeal. Although I gave it to my editor and she said, “This stuff’s really wild!” Vermont WomanIt’s so funny when you think you’re holding back, and everybody else is shocked. Annie SprinkleExactly. Actually it's a very fun book; I don't feel I had to hold back much. The publisher's very great, and the editor was great, and you know you can say a lot without having to say the word. Vermont WomanWe're so glad that the book's coming out; we can't wait to see it. Annie SprinkleI’m really excited about it. I think it’s got a lot of good, supportive information. Vermont WomanWe know that you are the guru of sexual pleasure and we know you’ve worked at this a long time. Annie SprinkleThirty-three years. Vermont WomanCan we ask what age you are now? Annie SprinkleI'm fifty. I consider my beginning at seventeen and a half when I first began documenting my sexual experiences; by 18 I was in pornography and prostitution, so I started pretty quickly. Vermont WomanYou did an interview in an anthology, Angry Women, a wonderful, funny interview; you told a story about how you started out working in a massage parlor… Annie SprinkleYes -- I didn’t even know I was doing prostitution for three months. Vermont WomanYou were just having fun and making people happy! Annie SprinkleI really thought I was a masseuse. Vermont WomanYou travel a lot for your work; where are you going next? Annie SprinkleOn Valentine’s Day I’m going to Walla Walla, Washington, and Nashville, Tennessee. I have college gigs in Santa Cruz, with my partner who teaches there. And then we have the snuggle performances, and I have to catch up on email! That’s a big thing because I was working so much on the book. Vermont WomanHow long did it take you to write the book? Annie SprinklePretty much a year. It was a long year. Vermont WomanYour official title is “Doctor” Annie Sprinkle -- tell us about your PhD. Annie SprinkleAfter having done a lot of different things in the sex field I was like, what’s next? I realized I wanted to learn a little more about the academic or scientific aspects so I went, with Joseph Kramer, who is my very dear friend and mentor and confidante, to the Institute For Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, in San Francisco. It’s been around for 27 years. Wardell Pomeroy was the dean there -- he was one of the people who wrote the Kinsey Report. There are very few places you can get a PhD in human sexuality -- there are maybe three in the United States, and that’s one of them. I did my dissertation -- it’s called “Providing Educational Opportunities for Sex Workers;” I explored the question, “What if there were continuing education courses, or college or whatever for sex workers -- what would they want to learn? What would be the important things that they would want to know to make their work better, their lives better? I did a survey, and then did a lot of research and wrote that up and about ten people have read it. That was that! It felt really good to get a PhD -- it felt reallygood! Vermont WomanA friend wanted us to ask if you have any advice about “lesbian bed death”? Annie SprinkleI do -- in my book! I have Dr. Sprinkle’s prescription -- and it’s not just lesbians; lots of people get it. There are a lot of different reasons for it, and different things work for different people. A lot of women find themselves celibate for a while and I encourage that, to have periods of celibacy sometimes; if someone’s sick -- there are all kinds of reasons for not having sex. But the best RX, the best medicine for no sex is have sex. So I have a seven-day treatment plan where you start out the first day with Verbal Appreciation Day; then there is Cuddling Day, and then there is a little Oral Sex Day, so you build up a little bit with no goal-oriented type things and then, on the seventh day, you go for it! But I think time is the main thing -- you know, you have to set aside the time; and when you get into the habit of not doing it, you have to really put some effort into getting back into it. The bed-death thing -- a lot of it’s communication, too; maybe there's something people need to talk about, and they’re afraid to talk about it. In terms of women, lesbians, as we get older: there’s some talk among some of my friends that the drive isn’t there; the libido is lessened -- but the arousal is there. So if you’re waiting around to get turned on, and then do it: no. You just find time, and start doing it -- and then the arousal kicks in, which is kind of a nice differentiation. In the book I talk a lot about spectacular sex massage. Sexual massage is really a fantastic tool, because you start out with a little nice touching -- it’s less goal-oriented, and one person can totally give and one can totally receive. You take more time with that than you might with sex. You set up a Massage Date -- it can be very, very sexually satisfying to really spend time with sexual massage, meaning, stimulating the genitals, the whole body -- so there are a lot of different ways to go. Vermont WomanWe're getting hot flashes just talking to you! Annie SprinkleThe best medicine for no sex is sex. And also, to expand your idea of what sex is, and do sexy things throughout the day -- start appreciating sexy things that happen, or being erotic in little bits and pieces; and it all builds up... Taking the time -- maybe you have to get rid of a committee or a hobby or something. I think that as we get older we become way more orgasmic generally, and way more better lovers, much better lovers as we’re older. If you watch porn movies with these young, young things -- they don’t really know how to do a lot of things, a deeper version, or a more skilled version of love-making. Vermont WomanSo what are you doing tonight? Annie SprinkleWe’re actually looking through our wedding pictures and working with our webmaster and getting everything up on “loveartlab.” Last night we went to an art lecture with a wonderful lesbian artist, Sheila Pepe. We spend a lot of time with our dog Bob. We spend a lot of time in bed actually, not always having sex; we love to snuggle and cuddle and kiss -- it’s really hard to get out of bed. Vermont WomanDo you have any favorite erotic films that you’d like to list for our readers? Annie SprinkleThey’re all mine! Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of Orgasm would be a great Valentine video; I list all my videos on my website. Other than that, I love West Side Story; I love the old movie Gypsy; I know this sounds so corny and schmaltzy, but I do love that movie Blue Lagoon with Brooke Shields. I like the movie Bound a lot; I just got to meet the director; that was very exciting. It’s a little scary but it’s a great love story. And The Sound of Music, of course! Oh, and Sweet Charity is kind of a love story -- and she has a heart tattoo -- “Hey Big Spender.” I wish there were more lesbian or women’s or feminist movies. So, yes, those, and my own. Vermont WomanWhat was your favorite valentine ever? Annie SprinkleOn the loveartlab site there's an opening picture of me and my girlfriend lying on a heart; we did a wonderful Valentine’s Day shoot last year, a whole bunch of photos about love; that was really wonderful. I like having all those pictures to remember that time, and my girlfriend was so willing -- she’s got a very conservative job -- well, not too conservative, but she has a day job -- and we did some sexy, nude pictures, and I was very touched that she was willing to do that on Valentine’s Day, although we haven’t published those, they were just private. So that was a really nice Valentine. We posed on a big giant heart. Vermont WomanThe big, red, sort of fluffy heart -- and you’re wearing these beautiful high-heeled shoes with red pom-poms on them. It’s gorgeous. Annie SprinkleI put the pom-poms on the shoes myself. That was a good valentine. Vermont WomanDo you like chocolate? Annie SprinkleI had to stop eating cookies, cakes, pies, and candies because I’m just way out of control -- a junkie; I had to cut that out. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs; but I was out of control -- that was my drug of choice. So I just cut that out; no one should send me chocolate, please. Tofu. Vermont WomanDo you have a Valentine wish for Vermont women? Annie SprinkleValentine’s Day -- what the world needs now is love sweet love; more love and pleasure, sex; a more pleasure-filled, happy, sexy world. My Valentine’s wish for the world is that everybody make love in some form or another, whether it’s sexual or not -- whatever form it takes: make love. Annie Sprinkle's websites: http://www.anniesprinkle.org Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality: http://www.iashs.edu/index.html A printer friendly version of this article is available. Vermont Woman is a forum for news, issues, features, arts and entertainment from the perspective, experience, and voices of Vermont women. Vermont Woman is a monthly newspaper published in South Burlington, Vermont and is excerpted here on this site. All content ©Copyright 2005, Vermont Woman Publishing |
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Why am I so interested in sex? Why have I devoted thirty years to
exploring it relentlessly? Because sexuality is not only something
that can be used for the enhancement of an intimate relationship, for
physical pleasure or procreation. It can also be used for personal
transformation, physical and emotional healing, self-realization, spiritual
growth, and as a way to learn about all of life… and death.
I want to help our society mature and evolve sexually, and be a safer
place. My motto is: Let there be pleasure on earth, and let it begin
with me. – Dr. Annie Sprinkle